Saturday, 11 June 2011

No longer a wax virgin

Yesterday I had a trip to the fleamarket and while I was there I thought I'd price up razor blades (as you do when you're at the fleamarket!) They were even more expensive than I remembered, but when I called in the Pound Shop later I saw they were selling a good brand name of wax.  So for that price I thought I might as well give it a go.  You never know, it might be the answer to my disposable razors problem. Seems like a bit of a faff to me, but it's not like I'd have to do it very often.

So there I was this morning, in my bedroom, wax at the ready and inspecting hair growth to decide where to test it.  Legs?  Hmm, not a lot of hair there actually.  Armpits then?  Pretty much the same.  It dawned on me that maybe I was being a bit obsessive about hair removal.  I thought you were supposed to get hairier as you get older?  The opposite seems to be happening in my case.

Anyway, I'd bought some wax so I had to try it - that's just the way my mind works.  I settled on my armpits as being the best bet (stupid, stupid!).  Warm the wax strip between your hands it said.  Ok, easy enough.  Now take the backing strip off and stick it on your skin.  Again, simple.  Next step, pull the wax strip off quickly whilst holding your skin taut.  If you don't hold your skin taut you may leave some wax residue or tear some of your skin off.  What?! Why didn't I read that first?!!  How am I supposed to hold my armpit skin taut when that hand won't reach and the other hand will be busy ripping the wax off?!  I decide all I can do is stretch my arm up as high as I can and that will pull the skin taut enough.  Wrong!  I ripped the wax strip off and most of the wax was left behind on my armpit.

My first thought was to try and wash it off, so I ran downstairs (still holding my arm out above my head as I'd discovered if I tried to put it down my armpit was glueing itself stuck!).  What a fantastic way to start the day, standing naked in the kitchen, arm above your head, waiting for the kettle to boil so you can have some warm water to wash a wax residue from your armpit!  And why did I think the wax would suddenly dissolve in warm water?  It didn't of course.  So, back upstairs to try something else, towel stuck under my armpit so I could put my arm down, as by now it was going numb.  A quick inspection in front of the mirror revealed that the hair under my armpits was now joined by bits of terry towelling stuck to my skin by the wax.

I had one other idea and desperately hoped it would work - I would use more of the backing strips and keep trying to rip the wax off.  It took several goes, but I finally managed to get most of it off.  However it was still a bit sticky so I thought, moisturisation might help.  Well, here's a tip for you - never apply baby lotion to your newly waxed armpit!  Ouch, that stung!

The only thing I was thankful for was that I had tested the wax on my armpit instead of going straight for my bikini line, which was what I was really wanted to use it on!  My armpit is still smarting tonight. Wax? You can keep it.  I'd rather be hairy!


  1. What a funny story, I agree, hairiness compared to THAT is very acceptable.

  2. I laughed about it later, but I was panicking a bit at the time!